Author: Nikradical

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31. Welcome Home

Nikradical

When I was little, around 7 or so, I got into an argument with my mom. I felt so angry, over something stupid, I’m sure. I was so upset, I decided the only thing to fix my woes was to run away. I emptied my barbie doll suitcase (it was the only one I owned), and I packed my necessities. A toy or two, or three, and a gatorade with some goldfish. In my eyes, that was all I needed. I told my mom I was leaving, and that I never wanted to see her again. I made it outside, … Continue reading 31. Welcome Home

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29. Episode 1

Nikradical

I can pinpoint the first time I truly became desperate in my life. I had recently turned 12, my 6th grade year had ended (my birthday’s April 27th). It was 2007, and prior to those two weeks, my mom, August, was acting strange. A term I would later come to understand as paranoid. She had sold all of our furniture, and what wasn’t sold, had been pushed to the back yard for “renovation” of our carpet. I didn’t question that at the time, our floor was at least 20 years old and absolutely disgusting. Then, I could only play outside … Continue reading 29. Episode 1

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5/17/20

Nikradical

I have the whole house to myself, and I’m finally working non-9-hour shifts, so there’s that. Man, those sucked, cause I would look at the clock and groan knowing I still had 7 hours of my shift left, lol. Last night was rough. It was just a 7 hour shift, but some lady yelled at me for getting her order wrong. I told her I’d fix it, she kept getting more frustrated. Then, my boss has to intervene and he says the same stuff I did and he’s suddenly – magically – correct for her order. Literally the order after … Continue reading 5/17/20

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4/15/20

Nikradical

So, thoughts. I have a waterfall of thoughts right now. First off, I’m not sick, I have a job, food on the table, etc. Life’s good in all of that sense. Emotionally, I’m both drained and excited. I know I’m wired from my work shift tonight, that was both really horrible and really good. The first half was miserable. My manager had a huge attitude problem tonight. Me being me, I struggled to save face for our customers, but they knew I was certainly not okay. It’s been awhile since I felt that panicked. It was a very stressful dinner … Continue reading 4/15/20

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February 4th, 2020

Nikradical

It’s 4:38 in the morning, and I’m doing a blog post because I got 4 hours of sleep and am not tired. Hello darkness my old friend. Well, we’ll see what comes to mind… Not much has been bothering me lately. I’ve been kind of cruising. Maybe finances? I need to get a job, but I have a nice cushion. But I still need to get a job. I haven’t been thinking about anything like my childhood, which I guess is nice. As bad as a lot of it was, I don’t want to forget it. It made me who … Continue reading February 4th, 2020